We’ve all been in a position where we are trying to offer a helpful ear to someone in a long distance relationship with a soldier. Supporting soldiers is no easy task, but understanding what their partners are going through isn’t a walk in the park either. At times people make things much worse while trying to ‘help’.
Here’s what you should never say to someone whose partner is deployed:
At least someone loves you
That really doesn’t help. If anything that hurts even more. Let them miss their partner and remind them of better times ahead instead.
There are kids dying in Africa
Telling someone their pain is not painful enough really sucks. If you’re this friend, please stop.
Always put them first
Telling either side to act like the other does no wrong doesn’t end well for any relationship – deployment or not. Encourage good communication instead!
Just be happy
No one chooses to be down in the dumps. Telling someone to just put their happy face on makes no sense and may make them feel more anxious and misunderstood.
Better fish in the sea
If they wanted better fish they would find the fish. Don’t add negativity to someone’s relationship.